I read a very thought-provoking article stating that there’s no happy harmony between career and motherhood.

The part that first stood out to me most is achievements of the self versus gifts of the self.

I’m almost thirty and have spent more than two-thirds of my life feeling very self-achieved. I was always top of my class and graduated as valedictorian. I excelled at basketball and hold a school record for scoring. I got into a competitive pharmacy school, graduated, and made what felt like a ton of money as a pharmacist manager.

These past few years of being a wife and mother have proved, that to me at least, being self-giving comes a lot less naturally. That’s not to say the two can’t and don’t co-exist. My husband, for sure, is very self-giving, yet still is achieving much in his career.

My thoughts are focused on whether we are taught (by society, formal education, our families) to lean towards self-achievement. And my thoughts are even more focused on how to teach my own children to become natural givers of themselves.

There’s nothing wrong with self-achievement in itself, with women doing great things besides mothering. I’m extremely thankful for the woman surgeon who performed open-heart surgery on my oldest daughter. She is a devout Catholic woman, and it doesn’t surprise me that she’s single. I wouldn’t doubt that she knew she couldn’t devote herself to her faith, an extremely taxing career, and a family of her own.

Sacrificing can go hand-in-hand with self-giving, and maybe to truly succeed, we have to sacrifice career or motherhood? At least to some degree? Since having kids, I’ve worked a bit here and there. Always a flexible schedule, always allowed me to be the primary caregiver of my kids, but am I kidding myself? Maybe I’ll never feel like I’m giving my kids what they deserve if I don’t focus more on being a steward of God.


About maggie

thirty-something. working on life.
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